Confucianism 儒家思想
人不知而不慍，不亦君子乎？
1.1:
子曰：「學而時習之，不亦說乎？有朋自遠方來，不亦樂乎？人不知而不慍，不亦君子乎？」
The Master said, "To learn and then have occasion to practice what you have learned — is this not satisfying? To have friends arrive from afar — is this not a joy? To be patient even when others do not understand — is this not the mark of the gentleman?"
While people nowadays think of "learning" as the pursuit of knowledge, the ancients though of it as cultivating the self. Confucius is interested in practical know-how, as in how to behave, rather than abstract theoretical knowledge.
The third sentence can be read in two ways:
- Be patient when not being understood
- Feel no resentment when unrecognized by others
Either way, it is encouraging us to learn for inner cultivation rather than external applause or status. If we study and act virtuously, our self-worth does not depend on whether others notice, praise, or reward us.
己所不欲，勿施於人
15.24:
子貢問曰：「有一言而可以終身行之者乎？」子曰：「其恕乎！己所不欲，勿施於人。」
Zi Gong asked, saying, "Is there one word which may serve as a rule of practice for all one's life?" The Master said, "Is not RECIPROCITY such a word? What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others."
Don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you. The same can be applied to parenting.
欲速则不达
13.17:
子夏為莒父宰，問政。子曰：「无欲速，无见小利。欲速则不达，见小利则大事不成」
Zi Xia, being governor of Ju Fu, asked about government. The Master said, "Do not be desirous to have things done quickly; do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished."
Don't rush. Don't be greedy over small gains.
見義不為，無勇也
2.24:
子曰：「非其鬼而祭之，諂也。見義不為，無勇也。」
The Master said, "To sacrifice to spirits that are not one's own is to be presumptuous. To see what is right, but to fail to do it, is to be lacking in courage."
Do what you are supposed to do, and avoid what you are not supposed to do.
君子無所爭
3.7:
子曰：「君子無所爭，必也射乎！揖讓而升，下而飲，其爭也君子。
The Master said, “A person of virtue has no contentions, except perhaps in archery! They bow and yield to each other as they go up [to the shooting platform], and come down to drink [the penalty cup if they lose]. Their competition is that of a gentleman (junzi).”
A gentleman doesn't compete for personal gains, status, or material things. Even when competing in archery, he is fair, respectful, and honorable.
Archery, a highly ritualized activity, is less about achieving victory and shaming others and more about deference and self-cultivation. As an etiquette of archery dictates, "If you miss the center of the target, turn and look for the cause within yourself."
Menicus 2:A:7: "Archery is the way of benevolence (ren). If one shoots but does not hit the bulls-eye, one does not begrudge one's victorious opponent, but rather simply looks within."